Artificial Intelligencer

•  A special technology supplement to The Mattopia Times  •

Wii Stuff

Wii: Boom Blox

Boom Blox
TBD

Got it at Target with their $10 gift card deal. Since it's got Spielberg's name on it, I "had to" grab a copy.

It's a decent little game.

Wii: Super Mario Galaxy

Super Mario Galaxy
9.5/10

A breezy, colorful game with lots of nice visuals. Good, casual gaming..

Wii: Tomb Raider Anniversary

Tomb Raider: Anniversary
TBD

Still messing around in Croft Manor. (Hey, I've been busy with film festivals, screenings, work, my own trip to Egypt, and... stuff!)

Wii: Umbrella Chronicles

Resident Evil:
The Umbrella Chronicles
8/10

Having finally passed the initial train sequence, the game's becoming more and more interesting.

It plays just as well, if not better, without the Wii Zapper.

Wii: Link's Crossbow

Link's Crossbow Training
9.5/10

The Zapper's OK. Link's Crossbow Training is terrific. Especially if you can find it for the non-scalper, original retail price of $19.99.

Wii: Metroid Prime 3: Corruption

Metroid Prime 3: Corruption
10/10

Hot on the heels of Resident Evil 4, here's another absorbing adventure.

Beautifully rendered and taking the Wiimote to even greater levels of integration, it'll be fun to continue exploring the extraterrestrial terrains on tap.

As an added bonus, the stress factor's a little lower on this one thanks to the absence of chainsaws.

Resident Evil 4: Wii Edition

Resident Evil 4: Wii Edition
10/10

Whoa! I remember playing a Resident Evil game at Dave & Buster's years ago. I vaguely recall it being an interesting experience.

Now this bad boy comes along for the Wii and it is really spectacular. Since the Wii is my reintroduction to video games after having gotten out of the gaming circuit ages ago, I never played any of the prior versions of RE4.

This one makes fantastic use of the Wii controls (the Wiimote and nunchuk are both used). Plus, with a $29.99 list price, it's a bargain.

But it most definitely earns the "Mature" rating. I was pretty stunned when Leon got his head chopped off by a chainsaw-wielding zombie.

Wii Sonic and the Secret Rings

Wii Play
6.5/10

If you need another Wiimote, this is worth picking up. The extra 10 bucks gets you Wii Play, a collection of nine mini games.

OK, only four of the games are good, but they're fun enough to warrant plunking down a Hamilton.

The good ones:
Charge!: A quirky race against the clock involving a cow and scarecrows.
Shooting Range: Self-explanatory.
Tanks: Duke it out in an old-fashioned tank battle game.
Laser Hockey: An update on air hockey.

Wii: Super Paper Mario

Super Paper Mario
8.0/10-ish

I dig it, but I haven't spent all that much time working my way through it yet.

Stay tuned...

Wii Rayman Raving Rabbids

Rayman Raving Rabbids
8.0/10

A politically incorrect video game. And highly entertaining.

Visit the Official Site to get an idea of the humor involved.

Wii Sonic and the Secret Rings

Sonic and the Secret Rings
8.0/10

Never played a Sonic game before and I'm extremely impressed with this one. The controls require some getting used to, but it pays off.

Not sure why so many "real gamers" don't like this one.

Wii Sports

Wii Sports
9.0/10

John Mattenroe finds Wii Tennis to be extremely therapeutic.
Joe DiMattio likes to take batting practice with Wii Baseball.
Rocky Mattciano trains on Wii Boxing.
Photos of these legendary Miitopians in action.

Wii Super Monkey Ball: Banana Blitz

Super Monkey Ball: Banana Blitz
8.5/10

It features the goofy kind of action that is so dearly enjoyed in Mattopia in glorious full color.

The Wiimote adds a new element to the gameplay.

Published in The New York Times!
31 January 2007

OK, so it's just a reader feedback column, but, dammit, I got published in the Times!

The column is here (entry #235), but, for posterity, here's what I wrote:

"'I haven’t owned a full-blown video game system since ColecoVision. Nintendo finally roped me back into the ring with Wii and I think it’s massively entertaining.

In my book, it’s a case of sour grapes for the Sony spokesman to call the Wii an “impulse buy” when people are still camping out in order to get one.'

— Posted by Matthew Anderson"

The article with the comment from Sony is here.

# # #

You say you want a Wiivolution?
Wiitopia joins the Mattopian Union: Let Miidom Ring!
23 January 2007 - Maattsterdam

Chancellor Mattimus first tried out the Wii on launch day, 19 November 2006. He was quickly sucked in by Super Monkey Ball Banana Blitz and was only mildly amused when a couple guys joked about how he was holding his Wii. Then there was the young kid (maybe 15 years old, tops) who came in and bought Scarface. Still not old enough to see the movie without a parent or legal guardian and not old enough to buy the game, technically, but his relative let him plunk down his birthday money for the game.

All the while, Chancellor Mattimus guided the Monkey Ball skillfully along the tracks... and ultimately saw the store sell its very last Wii right before his eyes.

It was probably just as well, he thought. Owning a game system is something of a financial commitment and he already has four Irish Rock Star Dependents to look after.

Nonetheless, after many, many years of shunning the gaming industry, aside from Nintendo's Gameboy and DS handhelds, which come in handy while traveling, the Wii was most definitely a "swiiiit" system and it continued to gnaw at and taunt the fair chancellor.

Well, nary two months later, the plunge was made. Perhaps partly inspired by Rocky Balboa stepping back into the ring after all those years, Mattimus finally took on the latest "next generation" gaming system, his first since the whole gaming industry went bust years and years ago. It was purchased at Target; standard retail price, no gratuitous bundling, no camping out.

The Wii created a strong enough argument as an innovative piece of technology to finally suck in Mattimus. Is he a Nintendork? Definitely. A Wiinie? Yeah.

Let the games begin...

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